Friday, November 12, 2010
Cassidy's #7: Erotic Fan-Fiction... Not (maybe)
Filch and Mrs. Norris caterwaul in a closet, Griphook and the dragon explore the forbidden treasures of passion, Barty Crouch Jr.'s kiss with a dementor quickly heats up...
It's been a long day and that's all I've got. All I can say is, once you've read a Draco/Lucius/Snape slash, you're never the same again. And I mean that in the worst way. Seriously, never do that.
But here it is on my favorites list because once you've explored the limits of the Harry Potter franchise, sometimes it is necessary to step into the uncharted world of fan-imagined sexual adventures where possibilities are endless.
This was all written in sarcasm... kind of.
I feel like I totally wasted this post but it is midnight and I am so ready to drift softly to sleep with Jim Dale chattering quietly by my side. Good #7, Sarah.
It's been a long day and that's all I've got. All I can say is, once you've read a Draco/Lucius/Snape slash, you're never the same again. And I mean that in the worst way. Seriously, never do that.
But here it is on my favorites list because once you've explored the limits of the Harry Potter franchise, sometimes it is necessary to step into the uncharted world of fan-imagined sexual adventures where possibilities are endless.
This was all written in sarcasm... kind of.
I feel like I totally wasted this post but it is midnight and I am so ready to drift softly to sleep with Jim Dale chattering quietly by my side. Good #7, Sarah.
#7 by s.s. JIM DALE
Arg. It's been a long and stressful day. Kind of cold. Headachey. Depressing. What do I want to do most on the world? To get comfy, drink tea, and listen to the dulcet tones of one man, Jim Dale. This man has read me to sleep for most of my life. I find that Jim Dale's performance of the Harry Potter books is like a second manifestation of the Potter series. Dale captures the whimsy, humor, seriousness, wit, and Britishness of the series like no other franchise. Cough, movies, cough. I love listening to the books on tape. One great thing about them is that they allow me to continually be immersed in JKRowling's words. Really, I am almost ALWAYS listening to one of the books. And have been since I was about 10. That is why I can pretty much quote any line from the books. I practically have them memorized. And boy, can I listen to them over and over! It really has to be like 100 plus times per book I have read/listened to. It's quite mad.
When I concentrate on the book on tape I get such a surge of endorphins! It is partly due to Dale's performative genius, and partly due to nostalgic sensations of youth and the memories of many years of pleasurable moments indulging in Jim Dale. Oh, but mostly due to JK Rowlings words.
I wuv Jim Dale. This post is not very good/coherant. Sorry. It HAS been a long and stressful day. Plus I am distracted by the voices of Harry and Dudley amidst the bougainvilleas....
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http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=YoPcqgCMy5g&feature=related
GENIUS! I can't write about Jim Dale. Just listen to him. Hmmmm :)
When I concentrate on the book on tape I get such a surge of endorphins! It is partly due to Dale's performative genius, and partly due to nostalgic sensations of youth and the memories of many years of pleasurable moments indulging in Jim Dale. Oh, but mostly due to JK Rowlings words.
I wuv Jim Dale. This post is not very good/coherant. Sorry. It HAS been a long and stressful day. Plus I am distracted by the voices of Harry and Dudley amidst the bougainvilleas....
<object width="480" height="385"><param name="movie" value="http://www.youtube.com/v/YoPcqgCMy5g?fs=1&hl=en_US&rel=0"></param><param name="allowFullScreen" value="true"></param><param name="allowscriptaccess" value="always"></param><embed src="http://www.youtube.com/v/YoPcqgCMy5g?fs=1&hl=en_US&rel=0" type="application/x-shockwave-flash" allowscriptaccess="always" allowfullscreen="true" width="480" height="385"></embed></object>
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=YoPcqgCMy5g&feature=related
GENIUS! I can't write about Jim Dale. Just listen to him. Hmmmm :)
Thursday, November 11, 2010
#8 by s.s. THE CONSTANT CONSTANT
Browsing through stills from the upcoming movie are making me want to poop with excitement. Clicking though pictures of the trio in really nice knit sweaters, and Luna all pale and bloody and Neville in his fat suit, et cetera, I paused on one photo featuring digital renderings of Dobby and Kreature, the house elves. "They're too small!" I thought to myself. Dobby wasn't that tiny in the Chamber of Secrets movie. And then I realized that Dobby looked larger in HPCS because that was seven years ago and Daniel Radcliffe was a little child and I almost barfed.
Because, holy shit, that was seven years ago. Because, after everything, seven years later, here I am. In fifth grade I skipped school to watch the second movie with my best friend and my mom. Seven years later, as an undergraduate student, I am skipping my Friday classes in order to attend the midnight showing with my current best friend. Not much has changed. But actually, yes it has! EVERYTHING has changed--everything except Harry Potter. Besides my immediate family, Harry Potter has been the most consistent factor (like a mathematical Constant) in my life since I was nine years old.
Friends, loves, fads, phases, obsessions, homes, personalities have come and gone as I have developed into an adult over the last ten years. Many of the ideas I thought were central to the core of my identity have changed radically. Almost everything has, really, except for the remaining, ever persistent, ever growing and devotional love for Harry Potter. It's really an extremely comforting thing, to have such a constant in one's life. Harry Potter has always been there for me. That's a cliche. Allow me to explain.
The scene opens on a young girl of about nine, with a tangled ginger braid, freckled and pale skin, transparent eyelashes and weird-looking knees. She's wearing the over-sized khaki shorts and bulky, itchy and hot pale blue polo shirt that signify her attendance to the creepy Lutheran school set in the mosquito-y, boggy marshes of Florida. Or what used to be marshes and is now paved in concrete and strip malls. This girl is me. Or was me. This reminds me of when Harry thinks about his past self, who lived under a cupboard, "as if remembering a younger brother, whom he had lost."
This awkward miniature version of myself was unhappy and taunted in school and only able to breath shallowly because of asthma and allergies and the insufferable humidity of Florida. And where should this dorky, ivory-skinned young lass find solace? Why, in the rainy country of England! With the dark haired, scrawny boy wizard named Harry Potter! I distinctly remember my dad reading the first chapter of Harry Potter aloud to Michael and I, as we rested our flaxen heads against each of our father's bony shoulders. Michael soon grew frustrated with the mystery of it all ("people in cloaks! who are they? why are they wearing cloaks??")(we had no idea where the book was going) and stormed off. But something about the music and whimsy of JKR's writing captivated me. I decided to be patient, to see where the story was going. And ever since I have found delight and love in the pages of Harry Potter.
Throughout elementary and middle school I hid from the world in Harry Potter. My copies became pathetic travesties of books--the bindings worn away, pages missing, glue failing, in several flaking parts, rubber-banded together. Mom banned me from reading them at one point because that was all I ever did. The space between my bed and my wall was chock-a-block full of crumbling hardcover copies of Harry Potter books--a hiding place soon discovered by my disparaging mother. In my elementary years I went nearly everywhere with a thick tome under my arm. When threatened with the big-toothed boy bullies in school, I was able to ignore them by immersing myself in Harry's story. And, interestingly, a few of those bullies somehow felt the weight of those hardcovers against their hollow skulls.
In high school, my Harry Potter mania increased when I met my Harry Potter soul mate, BFF and blog collaborator, Cassidy. The story is infamous--practically a modern fairytale by now, I should think. What do a bald, gossiping girl and a preppy and self-conscious Diaspora have in common? Nothing detectable by first glance or even by a celebrated psychoanalyzing personality test, that's for sure. Harry Potter was the the commonality, impetus and constant of our friendship. And it remains a constant! Our friendship started from movie stills from Order of the Pheonix, saw us attend the midnight premieres of the last book and sixth movie, and remains strong four (!) years later as we prepare for the second to last movie in the Harry Potter film franchise. (Happy Four Year Friendaversary, Cassidy!)
Still nothing brings me more comfort or joy than rereading the beloved words of the Harry Potter series, or listening to Jim Dale read them to me. It is my ultimate comfort and pleasure to revisit the same words again and again, that still never fail in delighting me and yielding more layers of wit, intelligence, and thematic meaning. The Harry Potter books are the kind worth reading over and over. The kind that can endure ten years of rough love (even if their physical pages and bindings don't). The Harry Potter books are the constant in the mathematical equation that is my life. AND THEY ALWAYS WILL BE. It is insanely comforting, knowing you will always have at least this one good thing always in your life.
I owe a lot to JK Rowling and the Harry Potter series. It helped me survive my childhood, adolesence and adulthood. It has brought me joy for over ten years. We go way back. I don't think I will ever stop loving Harry Potter. In fact, I know I won't. I said it when I was nine and I'll say it at nineteen:
I LOVE HARRY POTTER MORE THAN ALMOST ANYTHING IN LIFE!!!!
Because, holy shit, that was seven years ago. Because, after everything, seven years later, here I am. In fifth grade I skipped school to watch the second movie with my best friend and my mom. Seven years later, as an undergraduate student, I am skipping my Friday classes in order to attend the midnight showing with my current best friend. Not much has changed. But actually, yes it has! EVERYTHING has changed--everything except Harry Potter. Besides my immediate family, Harry Potter has been the most consistent factor (like a mathematical Constant) in my life since I was nine years old.
Friends, loves, fads, phases, obsessions, homes, personalities have come and gone as I have developed into an adult over the last ten years. Many of the ideas I thought were central to the core of my identity have changed radically. Almost everything has, really, except for the remaining, ever persistent, ever growing and devotional love for Harry Potter. It's really an extremely comforting thing, to have such a constant in one's life. Harry Potter has always been there for me. That's a cliche. Allow me to explain.
The scene opens on a young girl of about nine, with a tangled ginger braid, freckled and pale skin, transparent eyelashes and weird-looking knees. She's wearing the over-sized khaki shorts and bulky, itchy and hot pale blue polo shirt that signify her attendance to the creepy Lutheran school set in the mosquito-y, boggy marshes of Florida. Or what used to be marshes and is now paved in concrete and strip malls. This girl is me. Or was me. This reminds me of when Harry thinks about his past self, who lived under a cupboard, "as if remembering a younger brother, whom he had lost."
This awkward miniature version of myself was unhappy and taunted in school and only able to breath shallowly because of asthma and allergies and the insufferable humidity of Florida. And where should this dorky, ivory-skinned young lass find solace? Why, in the rainy country of England! With the dark haired, scrawny boy wizard named Harry Potter! I distinctly remember my dad reading the first chapter of Harry Potter aloud to Michael and I, as we rested our flaxen heads against each of our father's bony shoulders. Michael soon grew frustrated with the mystery of it all ("people in cloaks! who are they? why are they wearing cloaks??")(we had no idea where the book was going) and stormed off. But something about the music and whimsy of JKR's writing captivated me. I decided to be patient, to see where the story was going. And ever since I have found delight and love in the pages of Harry Potter.
Throughout elementary and middle school I hid from the world in Harry Potter. My copies became pathetic travesties of books--the bindings worn away, pages missing, glue failing, in several flaking parts, rubber-banded together. Mom banned me from reading them at one point because that was all I ever did. The space between my bed and my wall was chock-a-block full of crumbling hardcover copies of Harry Potter books--a hiding place soon discovered by my disparaging mother. In my elementary years I went nearly everywhere with a thick tome under my arm. When threatened with the big-toothed boy bullies in school, I was able to ignore them by immersing myself in Harry's story. And, interestingly, a few of those bullies somehow felt the weight of those hardcovers against their hollow skulls.
In high school, my Harry Potter mania increased when I met my Harry Potter soul mate, BFF and blog collaborator, Cassidy. The story is infamous--practically a modern fairytale by now, I should think. What do a bald, gossiping girl and a preppy and self-conscious Diaspora have in common? Nothing detectable by first glance or even by a celebrated psychoanalyzing personality test, that's for sure. Harry Potter was the the commonality, impetus and constant of our friendship. And it remains a constant! Our friendship started from movie stills from Order of the Pheonix, saw us attend the midnight premieres of the last book and sixth movie, and remains strong four (!) years later as we prepare for the second to last movie in the Harry Potter film franchise. (Happy Four Year Friendaversary, Cassidy!)
I owe a lot to JK Rowling and the Harry Potter series. It helped me survive my childhood, adolesence and adulthood. It has brought me joy for over ten years. We go way back. I don't think I will ever stop loving Harry Potter. In fact, I know I won't. I said it when I was nine and I'll say it at nineteen:
I LOVE HARRY POTTER MORE THAN ALMOST ANYTHING IN LIFE!!!!
Cassidy's #8: Community
Hogwarts: Moving staircases, secret rooms, the sorting... We all waited for our letters when we turned eleven years old. Personally, I expected Hagrid to come bursting into my home to tell me, "You're a wizard, Cassidy." because my parents had been hiding my letters. Days, months, and, finally, years passed and I gradually gave up hope that I would ever go to Hogwarts or even do magic. At the ripe old age of eighteen I still wistfully mutter "Lumos" as I flip a light switch or velcro a finger-flashlight to the end of my handmade wand when the power goes out. Not even AP US History class can measure up to Charms or Transfiguration but Hogwarts is just as much ours as it is Harry's, Ron's, or Hermione's.
Third grade Cassidy had two friends and both of them were bitches. I retreated into a world where they could not invite me to sit with them in the cafeteria and then whisper to each other about me from across the table. Like Harry escaping the Dursleys and finding a home for the first time, I found a haven in Hogwarts. I think that's true for a lot of kids. Hogwarts makes us feel like there is some place where we belong. And once we budding nerds had taken our place in the imaginary wizarding world, we found community in other budding nerds and the Rise of Nerddom was upon us.
One day, Sarah (polo-wearing new girl from Boca Raton, FL) and I (rolly-backpack-sporting weird kid with a shaved head) were forced to sit next to each other in the computer lab to take the Meyers-Briggs personality test. After we received our results (opposite in every category), I glanced side-long at Sarah's screen and found that she was viewing stills from the upcoming Order of the Phoenix movie. My eyes caught Sarah's, who was mimicking my dumb, wide-eyed gape, for I, too, had been viewing stills from the upcoming OOTP movie! The next thing I remember is the two of us nearly running down the hall in excitement, animatedly sharing our impersonations of Alan Rickman as Professor Snape, and clutching each other for balance as we soundlessly laughed all of the air out of our lungs.
That is power of Harry Potter. Like I said before, this series is more than the sum of its parts. Despite our many differences, it brought Sarah and I together because it represents a shared experience: The Harry Potter Childhood. Hogwarts castle was our safe place. SO! To little girls all over the world who crouch in the corners of their third grade classrooms with their faces intentionally hidden by enormous copies of Chamber of Secrets, you are not alone with your books. There are millions of people just like you and we are all connected in an invisible web of love and friendship and acceptance. Find friends in Harry Potter, my children!
Third grade Cassidy had two friends and both of them were bitches. I retreated into a world where they could not invite me to sit with them in the cafeteria and then whisper to each other about me from across the table. Like Harry escaping the Dursleys and finding a home for the first time, I found a haven in Hogwarts. I think that's true for a lot of kids. Hogwarts makes us feel like there is some place where we belong. And once we budding nerds had taken our place in the imaginary wizarding world, we found community in other budding nerds and the Rise of Nerddom was upon us.
One day, Sarah (polo-wearing new girl from Boca Raton, FL) and I (rolly-backpack-sporting weird kid with a shaved head) were forced to sit next to each other in the computer lab to take the Meyers-Briggs personality test. After we received our results (opposite in every category), I glanced side-long at Sarah's screen and found that she was viewing stills from the upcoming Order of the Phoenix movie. My eyes caught Sarah's, who was mimicking my dumb, wide-eyed gape, for I, too, had been viewing stills from the upcoming OOTP movie! The next thing I remember is the two of us nearly running down the hall in excitement, animatedly sharing our impersonations of Alan Rickman as Professor Snape, and clutching each other for balance as we soundlessly laughed all of the air out of our lungs.
That is power of Harry Potter. Like I said before, this series is more than the sum of its parts. Despite our many differences, it brought Sarah and I together because it represents a shared experience: The Harry Potter Childhood. Hogwarts castle was our safe place. SO! To little girls all over the world who crouch in the corners of their third grade classrooms with their faces intentionally hidden by enormous copies of Chamber of Secrets, you are not alone with your books. There are millions of people just like you and we are all connected in an invisible web of love and friendship and acceptance. Find friends in Harry Potter, my children!
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